When your body texts you "THIS ALL HAS TO CHANGE"

Everything sucks. Everything is fucked up. Everything is a dark, sad, and shitty low budget movie with REALLY bad directing and you’re tired of watching it.  You’re tired of starring in it. Something has got to change.

You honestly think your body doesn’t know that?

It’s the beginning of 2019. How long have you been feeling this way and ignoring it? Or if not ignoring it, trying to “think” your way out of it.

Maybe it’s time to stop compartmentalizing. Maybe it’s time that your mind and your body start working together.

Signs Your Body is Texting You: THIS ALL HAS TO CHANGE

  1. Feeling depressed?  

  2. Feeling anxious?

  3. Always tired?

  4. Unexplained pain in the neck, back and shoulders?

  5. Not losing weight though you are working out and eating right?

I could go on and on with the signs for this: Disease. Lack of energy. Chronic pain. Anxiety. Depression. Repetitive negative thoughts. Digestive issues. Inability to lose weight These are all indicators that something is the fuck wrong. Possibly, many things are wrong.

And know this: knowing/recognizing/understanding that shit’s not right is step one. A great step. And admitting that you don’t know?  That means you are open to possibilities. And possibilities are limitless. “I don’t know” means you’ve dropped the preconceived ideas of what change, recovery, or healing looks like.   

So let’s do this.

SCIENCE SHIT: THE FUCKERY OF STRESS

The primary reason your body is texting you (most likely repeatedly texting you) everything has to change is because of stress. Stress is so common in our culture and day to day lives that the idea that it could actually cause so much damage seems like a bit of an overreaction. But fuck that. Don’t let something abusive in your life lead you to believe that it’s “normal.” Your body certainly doesn’t think so.

There are 3 different types of stress:

  1. Physical stress: accidents, injuries, traumas and falls. Anything physical and unplanned that jarrs the body.

  2. Chemical stress: bacteria, viruses, blood sugar levels, heavy metals, hormones, foods, hangovers. Basically shit that happens to our body, including shit we do to ourselves.  

  3. Emotional stress: traffic jams, internet connections, 2nd mortgages, single parenting, moving, new jobs, getting divorced, boss, kids, death of a loved one. This is the “famous” one, the one we are told we can “talk through” with a therapist (not shitting on therapists! Most of us need one!), and ultimately the “stress” to which we attribute the most weight.

Now, take a look at this list. The majority of us deal with SEVERAL of these stressors daily. DAILY. Fuck, let’s be honest: Hourly? Again, just because we are living it doesn’t mean it’s “normal.” Yeah, it’s probably your normal and most people’s normal in the Western civilization.

But our bodies. Our bodies do not find this lifestyle normal. Hence all the texts.

Look, the body is equipped to deal with temporary stress. Temporary. But when the stress becomes chronic and persistent--like it is for most of us--we get the fuckery. We get the imbalances. We get the lack of sleep, happiness, body regulation. The depression.

Left unchecked, severe stress — the kind that continues for months or years — is more apt to lead to serious illness more than short-term stressors do.

Don’t take my word for it. According to Alka Gupta, MD, co-director of the Integrative Health and Wellbeing program at NewYork-Presbyterian/Weill-Cornell Medical Center in New York City.

“The stress hormones cortisol, adrenaline, and epinephrine affect most areas of the body, interfering with sleep and increasing the risk of stroke, high blood pressure, and heart disease, as well as causing depression and anxiety,” Dr. Gupta tells Everyday Health in this dope article you should totally read.  

For my real science nerds: check out the part about cardiomyopathy, or the broken heart syndrome: brought on by stress and 90% of the cases are in women.

MORE SCIENCE SHIT: BORN THAT WAY

If you need a greater reason to decrease the stress in your life, check this shit out: some of our stressors we were born into. There’s stress stored in your nervous system that you didn’t ask for or create.  When that stress has been wired into our nervous system during developmental times, it has long lasting effects.

According to a study by the National Center for Biotechnology Information, “Exposure to intense and chronic stressors during the developmental years has long-lasting neurobiological effects and puts one at increased risk for anxiety and mood disorders, aggressive dyscontrol problems, hypo-immune dysfunction, medical morbidity, structural changes in the central nervous system (CNS), and early death.”

Unfair and fucked up, right?

We can’t control how we grew up, what stressors were manifested during our development years, the instability of our home lives, or lack of homes entirely. Now we learn we’re at risk of early death because of it? Sounds like a rotten deal.

Dealing with these developmental stressors as well as not manifesting new ones is a is the most powerful method in counteracting the stressors we can’t control.  

Open yourself up to the possibility that stress does not have to be a normal part of your life. You can live a happy stress-free or at least minimally-stressed life. Is it easy? No. It takes hard work. Sacrifice. Intentional living and intense life changes that in and of themselves are stressful. Family and friends may even give you push back on these changes.

But in all honesty: what is the fucking alternative? Everything has to change. You know that already. Your body knows that. Why pretend that going back to the way things were is even an option?

Trust yourself. Trust your body. Trust your instinct. And let’s get to work.  

Our bodies just texted us THIS ALL HAS TO CHANGE. What do we text back?

  1. LOVE Self-love is like any other important relationship in your life. You have to make time for it, you have to commit, and you have to be passionate. You don’t miss date night with your significant other. You NEVER miss your daughter’s dance recital. Why? You care about her development, her security, and her knowledge that you’re always there for her. It MUST be the same with yourself. You deserve that devotion. We discussed this in my previous blog. Make space. Make time. Nothing changes if nothing changes. Step one in the process is to make space for it. Whether that means 10-15 minutes a day of self care/self love or a two week retreat to reassess your life. Heal the disconnection. Make space and time for YOU.

  2. ENERGIZE The thing I love about this particular blog is it culminates everything we’ve been discussing in the past blogs. The most immediate way to change the way you feel is by changing the foods that you eat because the food you take in are the building blocks of your cells, tissue, organs and ultimately you.  See  my blog post about eat a vegetable  

  3. MOVE The second most tangible way to change the way you feel is to move. The body stores memories, experiences and stress (see blog post about BITCH, GET OFF THE SOFA!). Movement can release those memories so that they don’t affect your body, immune system, metabolism, etc in negative ways.

  4. RISE This won’t happen unless you MAKE it happen. Make the changes. This is the hardest and scariest part. Each day take one step, whether large or small, toward the changes you need to make. That could just be giving yourself 10 minutes to do a breathing exercise or it could be quitting your job to invest yourself full time in what you are passionate about. In either case, just do it.

We truly are limitless; full of possibility and change. But we have to be willing to do the work. .And when you are, I’m here. Ready to help.

Questions or comments? Hit me up here or on any fuckin’ platform you want!

 Thanks so much for listening to your body with me. And with every conversation please: Love, Energize, Move, and Rise!

 Happy fucking New Year!


Stacy Berman